2016: Losing Inhibitions and Gaining Friendships
“And now we welcome the new year. Full of things that have never been.” ~ Rainer Maria Rilke
This year could be called the year of relationships. It has taught me a lot about them from friendship to romantic, and everything in between. But most importantly of all my relationship with myself.
Perhaps it was because in 2015 I was recovering from undiagnosed lyme and had just thought I was ging crazy. But I sure made up for the heavy Netflix laden becoming one with my bed that 2015 had been. This year I let my party girl fly and while many of my adventures can not be retold (read What Happens in Greenport STAYS in Greenport) for fear of death from my cohorts, the memories will live on cultivating and shaping me long into the new year.
What they say about travel really is true. When you travel to different places you not only expand your horizons, you learn more about yourself. I delved deeper into myself and discovered a confidence I didn’t have. One where I was much more open with who I am and the people around me. I came to a place where gossip, innuendo, and assumptions had no hold over me. Where I was comfortable in my own skin and with who I am as a woman.
Relationships begin and end with yourself. They are a two part relationship. You and the other person. And yes, it always takes two. If you don’t have that self-love already no person is going to be able to give that to you, especially if it is a romantic relationship.
One of the biggest lessons I learned this year was that it is alright to be single regardless of what people say. I had several people close to me really push the relationship question every time I saw them, like I wouldn’t be complete unless I was in a relationship or married.
I won’t be complete unless I am okay with who I am inhabiting this body living, actually LIVING in this life. I make my happiness. Everyone else ADDs to it. As people, especially women, we forget that.
I know I did.
Self-love. It is called SELF-love for a reason. Because it starts with YOU.
Yet, I also learned what it means when you have good people who do add to your life. This year was full of new and old friendships. People I could confide in. Truly confide in, with no judgement or taking the moral high ground on my choices. Who accepted me for who I am. Friendships that really did add joy to my life, and yes even reality checks. After all we all need those.
While 2016 has been a re-invention of sorts of who I am and the confidence I have found with-in. It has also given me a lesson in timing. Timing really is everything. To find someone who is on the same page as I am on all aspects of life and doesn’t just shower me with things, but with memories, is an incredible gift. I thank 2016 for being the year that showed me relationships don’t have to end in bitterness, because sometimes they might just come ’round full circle.
This year has seen a tremendous amount of growth. There have been many tears and laughter amongst the lessons and rebirth. But then that is life. The good and the bad. I have said it before and I will say it again. We don’t want things to be sunshine and roses all the time for if it was, we would never have reason to appreciate those good moments.
I know 2016 was tumultuous for many, but life is an evolution. It is phases that ebb and flow like the ocean. We have passages that are great and passages that are horrendous. But it will always change. WE are the catalyst for that change. So while yes, we have a New Year, just remember it isn’t 2017 that will be better. It is tomorrow. Next Week. Next month. It is when we choose to change. It is when we choose to seek to be our better selves.
May you all have a Happy, safe, and exciting New Year! <3
What did 2016 teach you? What were some of your accomplishments or goals?