“I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat.” ~Rebecca West
Happy International Women’s Day friends!
While I cheer on this day, we women should be celebrated every frickin day! After all, no one would be here if it wasn’t for women. We are the ones to birth civilization and yet, womanhood is attacked on all sides depending on who we agree or disagree with like this quote says. After years of fighting for our rights. Of seeing my relatives and ancestors fight for freedoms that should be basic god given rights to ALL humans, it especially feels prevalent right now. AND that makes me sad because being a woman is such an incredible gift.
Don’t get me wrong, there are definitely days, pretty much every month when I curse it, (thanks wonky reproductive and endocrine systems), but those same days are also a reminder of how strong I am and how incredible my body really is, even if in that moment I don’t always feel like it. For centuries we’ve been made to feel ashamed, and like our only worth is as a brood mare. Don’t be to loud, don’t be to slutty, work hard, but not hard enough, be girly, but not to much, have kids, but not to many or to early. The dualities are not only endless, but mind boggling and to all of it I say f#$% it. F@#$ ALL of it and be the bad ass woman you want to be. That you were MEANT to be.
Who I am
I am learning to embrace that myself. Growing up I received a ton of judgement because I always loved fashion, and yet I was also smart, and some how those two things don’t go together. Nor did wanting to climb trees in a tutu and Claire’s glitter (which I proudly did) or the myriad of other contradictions that were honestly true to my Gemini sign. People tried to put my free spirit self in a typecasted box. And in some ways I did let them.
As I got older, I learned to “dumb” myself down, to play off my accomplishments thus I didn’t offend anyone or make anyone feel bad, and that went for both men and women. And yet I still received a ton of judgement, yes I was going to university, but what was I going to do with those degrees, to my blog, before content creation became a BILLION dollar business, and even after that it was oh you are an “Influencer” like it was some sort of swear word which I refused to use for the longest time. All of this judgement also created a lot of imposter syndrome, and like I was;t worthy of my accomplishments, and I needed to try more, work harder, be better.
It has taken me decades, decades, to stop worrying about pleasing everyone, because you can’t and you aren’t going too. And as women, we especially can not win. Hell we can’t even win with-in our own gender. So it is time to start pleasing OURSELVES. Living for us. Being a woman is an incredibly beautiful and special thing, that we shouldn’t dumb down for anyone or anything.
I rock dresses, not because I am oppressed, but because I f$%#ing love them. My red lipstick doesn’t make me a slut, but actually is my strength and is part of my armor. I am honest, and it might come across as brash, but what you see is what you get, IF you get to know me. My femininity does NOT weaken me, but it actually makes me stronger, and I am so frickin proud to be a woman. And I am DONE apologizing for that.
I’ll leave you with this quote from the late great Betty White:
“Why do people say, ‘Grow some balls’? Balls are weak and sensitive.
If you really wanna get tough, grow a vagina. Those things really take a pounding!”
Dang straight Betty! So let’s celebrate women, not just today but every day. Let’s honor each other, lift each other up, and support each other, because this world is hard enough, but also the world NEEDS us, no matter WHAT they say. Sending all my love to the bad ass women out there and I am so grateful to the incredible strong women in my life! I love you all! <3
Who is a woman you admire?