“Time is only an idea. There is only the Reality. Whatever you think it is, it looks like that. If you call it time, it is time. If you call it existence, it is existence, and so on. After calling it time, you divide it into days and nights, months, years, hours, minutes, etc. Time is immaterial for the Path of Knowledge.” ~ Ramana Maharshi
Adios January
I am pretty sure we can all happily say peace out January, do not let the calendar hit you in the posterior. Maybe it was just me, though I know a lot of my blogging friends felt the same way, but January was not butterflies and sunshine. It was disgusting dirty snow and arctic temps that should be illegal.
While people were getting excited about changing themselves those first few days, it was all I could, to pull myself out of my warm bed, because leaving a warm bed to go out into the cold is its’ own kind of torture. And to do it because I made a resolution? Oh hell no!
January Hell
For me January has never been new and exciting. I do not get giddy with the New Year. I do not actively try to change myself, nor do I jump on the resolution bandwagon. And no it is not because I am perfect.
Though I mean I am.
Kidding.
As someone who suffers from Seasonal Affective Disorder, January is its own hell for me. At least in November and December there is the excitement of the holidays to keep it somewhat at bay. But in January it all comes crashing down. This January was particularly bad.
No rhyme or reason, except it sucked. Yes, I had outside forces playing their part to drag the month down into the proverbial snow drift. But usually I am pretty good about handling adversity. In fact a lot of times I flourish with it.
Baby Steps
Not this time. If I got out of bed, it was a miracle. It was agony watching the date change at a snails pace, a never ending loop of January hell. Now it seems like it was ages ago.
January is a month where I have come to know my limits. I don’t make resolutions, because they will just make me feel even more like the failure I am. I do make goals. Some times they are as simple as getting out of bed, which in actuality is a huge accomplishment on certain days. Sometimes they are bigger, like I will go for a run, or heck I will actually stop being anti-social and grab coffee with a friend.
Once I accomplish one, I make another. And little by little I pull myself out of my slump. They may not seem like that big of a deal to some, but to me they are. There are days where I fail. Horribly. Where the slumbering warmth of bed has put a noose around my body, and won’t let me go, causing my soul to shrivel and follow the White Walkers into their melancholy land of frozen ice.
Self-care
It is why baby-steps are so important. Literally putting one foot forward at a time and giving myself compassion instead of beating myself up for being an epic failure. Which I tend to do. A lot.
Baby steps that are not just doing the every day mundane tasks but that are also filled with self-care.
One of the huge lessons I have learned in the last year, is to let myself lean on people. Family, friends, lovers, they are there not just to take, but also give. (and if they do just take find new friends) I admit, letting people in does not come easy to me. I am a nurturer not a leacher, but by letting people in, I have also found and strengthened friendship.
I have also learned that it is okay to be selfish and take time for myself. In fact it isn’t really selfishness, but actually healthy. Our first and best relationship should be with ourselves. If we don’t have a healthy dialogue with in us, we won’t with the outside world and that shows. Taking time to do what makes me happy both physically and mentally, is beneficial to everyone. Trust me, you do not want to be around me when I am miserable. No one wants that energy!
Which is why I happily bid January adieu. While February has started off frozen and still pretty darn dreary, I am at least a little bit hopeful for the reset I have planned. The days are starting to get longer and there is hope around the corner. And when all else fails their is always a trip to some place just a tad bit warmer to get me over the February hump.
What do you do to fight the Winter Blues? How do you get through the cold months?
I suffer from depression and anxiety year round but I do find January to be the hardest months because of the New Year. I see everyone starting their New Year’s Resolutions and trying to become the best person that they can be whilst I can barely get out of bed some days, let alone go to the gym 5 times a week. I think it’s important to remember that you are on different paths – what you might struggle with, someone else might not but it also works in the other respect that something you find easy, they might struggle with. Hopefully with the warmer months this feeling will begin to alleviate. x
I so agree… I detest January for the same reasons. And February come to that. March sometimes brings promise of warmer and longer days, April is my birthday month and is often wet here in the UK. May and June usually find me ditching the coats and hoping for T-shirt weather and July through August as the moisture is sucked from the land and drought often leads the way, I soak up the heat on the patio whenever I can. Sept and Oct can often provide peculiar days of heat known as Indian summer and these are special days to me, more opportunities to bank and store heat before autumn truly sets in and steals the happiness while the leaves turn brown. November and Decemebr bring festive occasions to distract us from miserably short and cold days. Before it all starts over 🦋
Reblogged this on Crazy Pasta Child.
👏🏼 yaaassssss! Girl, January was it’s own fresh hell this year. It was gloomy, long and just plain terrible. I’m hate that you had such a blah month but I’m glad that you know your limits and are willing to set your boundaries, be selfish and lean on people when you need a pick-me-up. I hope February treats you better and that you’re having a fab day! Hugs! 😍💗
I think January can be really tough, luckily I had some exciting events to look forward too so it was quite a good month for me xx
Loved this! I’d never heard of Seasona Affective Disorder before, but it actually sounds like something I might be with you – around this time of year EVERY YEAR my mental health just goes “no thanks” regardless of what life itself is like….<3
Winter months are definitely hard to get through. Since I get them from June to August, I tend to retreat into a little depression, as there’s nothing going on in those months. Just cold. Self-care and baby steps are definitely the way to go to get through it 🙂
Beautiful post and pictures, I feel such a sense of peace and calm just looking at it x
I am definitely with you on the “bye bye January” attitude! You have such a way with words; this post calmed me massively. I agree with you that leaning on others is helpful. We humans need some help sometimes! Xxx
I’m sorry to hear that you had a bad month, but as you said, there is definitely always hope around the corner and spring will be here in no time! You are very strong – well done for getting through what can be a very tough month for many people, and acquiring a healthy attitude towards self-care. I myself struggle with the combination of shorts days and cold weather in particular, so try to focus as much as possible on other events/activities in my life to keep me and my mind occupied. I hope you are well and that you are having a great February so far! Xx
I am so glad January is over, too! It’s just a long, tough month!! Spring will be here before we know it and I can’t wait! The way I fight winter blue is to try and to the thing I don’t feel like doing, which is going out and about! It’s usually not so bad once I’m out, even if it’s dark and cold!
It really is! Neither can I! I felt like it was teasing us the last few days and I loved it!
That is a great idea! And I agree! If I can get myself out of bed, once I am out it does get better. I hope February is an amazing month for you!💗
This is so good.